Returning To France!
by ForbiddenKHfan216
Summary: When Sora's and Riku's families go to france for vacation,the boys try desperately to keep randomness to a minimum.With the Organization on the way and Riku's little sister driving them crazy,will they have a normal vacation for once?Sequel to KHinFrance
1. Destiny Islanders Pack

**Hiya guys!**

**I'm FINALLY starting the Return to France fic!**

**Let's see how well it goes!**

**Disclaimers: Naturellement, this is not mine! XD**

* * *

Destiny Islands: Minami Residence

"Hurry Sora! We have to meet the Takamuras at the airport!" Mrs. Minami urges her son.

"I am! I can't find Ultimia!" Sora calls over his shoulder as he goes through drawers in the kitchen.

"OH NO YOU DON'T! NO KEYBLADING IN FRANCE!" She scolds.

"Geez.... We're gonna be here all day!! HURRY THE FREAK UP!!!" Blade Minami, Daichi Minami's younger brother, complains and honks the car horn.

"Sora must be looking for something." Daichi, Sora's father, says with a grin.

"NOOO!!" Sora runs outside holding a Keychain and scoots inside the back seat of the car.

"SORA! I SAID NO KEYBLADES!" Sakura Minami scolds.

"But I need it!" Sora complains.

"JUST LET HIM TAKE THE STUPID THING!" Blade yells impatiently.

"FINE! BUT IF YOU TAKE IT OUT FOR AYTHING BESIDES A FULL OUT HEARTLESS INVASION, YOU ARE GROUNDED FOR A MONTH!!!" Mrs. Minami threatens.

"Okay! ... I left my backpack in the house!!" Sora unlocks the door and runs back to the house for his red backpack.

".. My god, I'm strangling that boy." Blade snarls. Sora comes back and sits in the back seat again.

"Sora, did you bring enough underwear?" Mrs. Minami asks, going through her purse for the tickets.

".... How much is enough?"

"... Enough for the three weeks."

"..... Maybe I should go get some more..."

"NO! JUST GET FRENCH ONES!" Blade slams the car in Drive (it was a stick shift) and starts gunning the thing to the airport.

"Who let him drive?!" Mrs. Minami squeals as Blade crashes over a pot hole.

"You want me to drive?" Daichi asks. She turns pale.

"Honey, I love you, but I trust SORA more behind the wheel."

"HEY!" Sora's bouncing off the back seat.

"Sora, put your seat belt on."

"HOW?!" Sora finally manages to grab onto something and holds on tight. He clicks the belt in place.

Airport

".... What's that.... DUCK!" Mr. Takamura orders and everyone immediately listens.

BAM! A beat up blue car skids in place besides the Takamuras.

"Sakura, I think the important thing to notice is that we all survived. Basically without injury too!" Blade says nervously as Mrs. Minami glares at him.

"I think my head exploded..." Sora moans and sits up.

"Sora baby! Get out of that death trap NOW!" Mrs. Minami helps him out.

"Kura, he's fine." Daichi says and shakes his head.

"... Ten toes... ten fingers... four limbs... a head... Yup! 100 percent fine!" Sora says proudly.

"Come on, 'Sora baby'." Riku smirks. Yuki hits him with her purse.

"Leave So So alone! You okay, little guy?" She says and gives him a big hug.

"Sure, Yu Yu!" Sora hugs her back. Kairi and her stepfather walk up.

"Hiya Kai Kai!" Yuki hugs her too.

"Hi Yu Yu! You coming too?" Kairi asks.

"Of course! The romance... The City of Lights...French chocolates.. REAL BAGETTES!" Yuki says happily.

"Yuki..." Dante sighs.

"I'll leave her with you Sora, Daichi." The mayor smiles and gives Kairi one last hug, an envelope full of munny and leaves.

"Bye Daddy!" Kairi calls out behind him. He waves and the group looks to Sora (Minami).

"....Sora, what the hell are you doing?" Riku asks. Sora's drawing something in the sand.

"... I have no idea.... But it's important!" Sora says and finishes his picture.

"Idiot!" Dante grabs him and forces the group to the ticket counter.

"WHY CAN'T I GO?!" Erika wails as her brother finishes buying the tickets.

"Because, I don't want you getting hurt." Mr. Takamura says.

"... Yuki's going."

"Yuki can take care of herself."

"Yuki can't even work the toaster oven! How the heck is she gonna go to a foreign country?! She'll get arrested!" Erika protests.

"... So has Sora, he's fine." Riku points out.

"What do you mean, Sora got arrested?" Mrs. Minami says angrily. Sroa turns pale.

"LOOK! OUR FLIGHT!" Sora picks up his red suitcase and backpack and runs to the gate.

"Hahaha, I remember trying to bust your ass out of jail!" Riku teases Sora.

"Shut up! I seem to remember YOU being chased by French fangirls!" Sora says with a grin.

"At least I wasn't mistaken for a girl." Sora takes a swing at Riku.

"Ri Ri! So So! STOP FIGHTING NOW!" Yuki yells and slams the two boys's heads together.

"... Yuki, that's not helpful.." Dante sighs and helps the two up.

"... Stars...." Sora mutters, dazed. Then they notice a commotion in the front of the line.

"Look, if you're under 18, you have to have a parent or guardian accompany you!" A flight attendant says angrily.

"Look, I told you TWICE, I don't have any!" Haru Takamura snaps.

"HARU!!!" Yuki tackles him.

"YUKI?!" The rest of the group comes.

"Thanks for holding our spot in line, Haru Haru." Dante says with a grin.

"Are you with him?" The woman asks. Dante flashes her a seductive grin.

"Naturallment, miss. I am his older brother." he says.

"... Hey, if Dante's gonna be seducing every woman, why can't I go?" Erika complains.

"EXACTLY because of that!" Riku says and calls the neighbor that would be taking care of Erika for the 3 weeks. The neighbor comes and takes Erika home.

"Soo.. They're your guardians?" the woman asks Haru.

"YES, NOW will you let me on board?!" Haru asks angrily. She nods and stamps everyone's passports. They all file into the plane going to France.

"Sooo, why aren't you with the Organization?" Sora asks as Haru sits nexts to him and Kairi.

"Because, I got lost." Haru says embarrassed.

"... the whole walking through darkness will do that to you." Riku comments.

"Will the party with the little girl with the brown hair, PLEASE, tell her to get out of the bathroom!" A flight attendant says.

"... Oh no." Riku stands up. The plane's already in the air. He marches over to the bathroom. Erika falls out.

"Hihi big brother!" She hugs Riku.

"ERIKA I SAID TO STAY HOME!!" Riku scolds.

"... Uh.. I kinda gave her a ticket." Dante says. Erika proudly holds it up.

"I'M GOING TO FRANCE!!" She squeals.

"Oh hell...." Riku and Haru mutter in unison.

"HIYA!" A little girl scoots into the seat next to Riku.

"......" It was the SAME GIRL!!! FROM BEFORE!!!

"Hihi, Miss Riku boy!" Karry says happily.

"NOOOO!!!! GET ME OFF THIS PLANE!!" Riku yells.

"RIRI! Shut up!!" Erika hisses and throws CoM at him.

"Erika, if you love me, change spots with me. NOW." Riku begs.

"Sure! Hihi, I'm Erika." She says to Karry.

"You're pretty..." Karry says shyly.

"Thanks!"

"... " In for a long flight, everyone starts to doze off.


	2. Organization XIII Packs

**did ANYONE notice that Karry's back?**

**you know, the little girl who thought Riku was a girl in the FIRST Kh goes to France?**

**No?**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy or Birth By Sleep are not mine. Got it memorized?**

**hey, guess which ones is Xemnas! XD**

* * *

**Castle that Never Was**

"Is everyone packed?" Xemnas calls out.

"NO!" Xion screams.

"Xion, you cannot bring food on the plane!"

"It's NOT food! It's SNACKS! Totally different!"

"Hey Superior? Can I bring my sitar?"

"Demyx, for the last time, YES! You CAN bring your sitar!"

"SWEET! .... Which one?!"

"Arpeggio!"

"... But Arpeggio's missing a string!"

"PUT ONE ON!!"

"... Oh, okay! Thanks!"

"Hey, Xemmy? Can I bring my Sharp-"

"NO!"

".. I DIDN'T EVEN FINISH!"

"NO GUNS."

".. But-"

"NO. GUNS."

"... One pair."

"Fine, ONE."

"BOO YEAH!"

"Superior? Marluxia packed like thirty roses in his suitcase, what should I do?"

"Thirteen, get the roses out of the suitcase and make him pack clothes!"

".. He does have clothes, just that he packed another suitcase full of roses!!"

"THEN BURN THE SUITCASE!"

"ARE YOU CRAZY?! LAST TIME SOMEONE DID THAT, MARLUXIA WENT- ..... NOT THE FACE!!! NOT THE FACE!!!! GAAAAAH!!!"

"ELEVEN! LEAVE THE BOY ALONE!"

"Never!"

"KNOCK IT OFF!!!"

"Thank you Axel!"

"No problem, now. Marly, you gonna strangle people with roses? I'm gonna show ya that it's _ALL_ about the fire! BURN BABY BURN!!!"

"NOOOOOOO!!!"

"... Superior? How long are we going to be there?"

".. Three weeks Zexion."

"... How many books can I bring?"

"... 10."

"...... But-"

"No buts."

"Yes sir..."

"....." Xemnas sighs. It was hard work organizing a trip for nearly 20 people.

"Superior, Haru has disappeared." Vexen says.

"... Does he have his ticket?"

"Yes."

"Then he will find us. I am confident in his abilities."

"Yes sir."

"Superior! Namine locked herself in her room!"

"... Larxene, that might work with Demyx, but I know for a FACT that Namine wouldn't do that."

"... FOR REAL!!!"

"GET HER OUT THEN!"

"... Alright, alright.. Stupid son of a bitch..."

"WHAT WAS THAT?!"

"I SAID I have a bad itch!"

"... Go get some calamine lotion."

"... Dumbass..."

"Superior!!!"

"WHAT FOR GOD'S SAKE IS IT?! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I'M BUSY!?"

"........" Xion bursts into tears.

"ROXAS!!!" She runs off.

"STOP YELLING AT MY SISTER!"

"TELL HER TO STOP CRYING!"

"... Uh, I wonder if this is a good time to mention that we're all packed and ready?" Axel says nervously.

"..." Namine's being dragged out by Larxene.

"But I don't want to go! Last time, lots of bad things happened!" Namine says nervously.

"You superstitious now?" Larxene asks. Namine nods.

"Roxas nearly got killed by French fangirls and we had our first fight ever! I'm not going!" Namine says stubbornly.

"You're going Namine. Don't you want to protect Roxas from the fangirls?" Larxene says with a grin.

"... They hate me..." Namine says sadly.

"No, they hate Kairi." With that, all the Organization teleport to the airport in Hallow Bastion. In front, there's a commotion as two guys take out swords and start fighting.

"... TEN ON THE BLONDE GUY!" Xigbar calls out.

"You're on! 30 on the brown haired guy!" Axel grins.

"100 on the black haired girl!" Xion calls out.

"... what?" Ahead, a black haired woman slams the fighting men's heads together and gets them to stop fighting.

"Vous me devez de l'argent, mon ami!" Xion holds out her hand.

"what?"

"She said you owe me money my friend." Zexion translates.

"...Crap."

"Et pour les jurons trop !"

".. what?"

"And for swearing too."

"............" Xigbar and Axel drop money into Xion's Cuss Cup. They hand her their wallets.

"Merci beaucoup!"

"Thank you."

"STOP TALKING IN FRENCH!!!"

"Organization XIII, on the plane!" Xemnas commands. They all file onto the plane and everyone gets their buddy.

"Nous allons avoir du plaisir!" Xion tells Lexaeus. (Let's have fun!)

"Oui." He smiles and pats her head. (Yes.)

"...." Axel immediately starts snoring. Roxas rolls his eyes and yanks the stolen pillow away from the drooling redhead.

"....Superior? Can I start singing?" Demyx asks next to Axel.

"NO!"

"I have a bad feeling about this..." Namine whispers to herself. Xemnas pats her on the head.

"Not to worry, Miss Namine. It is quite safe." Saix says encouragingly.

"Dude..." Xigbar groans as Xaldin starts hogging the arm rest.

"..... Touch me, and you die." Larxene glares at Luxord.

"Rest assured, I wouldn't dream of touching something like you." He rolls his eyes and starts shuffling a deck of cards telepathically.

"...." Marluxia is trying to keep as far away from Saix as possible.

After a very, very long ride, most of the Organization finally manages to fall asleep.

".... Full house Luxord." Namine says and shows him her hand of cards.

"... I'd swear you and Sora cheat!" Luxord mutters to himself.


	3. Final Fantasy Crew's Packing and Flight

**Lol, we got the Organization!**

**We got the Islanders!**

**Who else do we need?!**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts isn't mine, though I loves it so. :D**

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x X**

Hallow Bastion/Radiant Gardens to be P.C.

"Aerith, how much of dis stuff do ya want?!" Cid calls out to Aerith while holding a bottle of sunscreen.

"... Three bottles." She says and starts folding some of Cloud's shirts into a suitcase. Cid sticks the bottles into a bag.

"And why didn't cha tell those two that we're gonna go on vacation?" he asks and absentmindingly strokes his toothpick in his mouth.

"Because. It's a surprise." Aerith says and finishes in Cloud's room. She goes to Yuffie's room to start packing for the little Ninja.

"And Yuffie?"

"Yuffie can't really keep a secret." Aerith folds some of Yuffie's jeans and sticks them into the suitcase.

"Lucky ya won that trip, right?" Cid calls out and makes sure he has the tickets safely tucked into his pocket.

"I know right? Won't they be surprised." Aerith smiles and carefully folds some more of Yuffie's clothes, being careful to take out ninja stars while folding.

"DAMMIT LEONHART! I'm TELLING you, that you're supposed to go right THEN left!" Cloud Strife's voice carries from the front door.

"And I'm telling YOU Strife, that's the Sword formation, not the BLADE formation." Leon's voice says coldly.

"And I'm telling you both! WHO THE HELL CARES?!" Yuffie cries out.

"Hey Aerith! Idiots're here!" Cid calls out.

"WHO'S AN IDIOT!" Cloud growls.

"... Obviously, the one growling." Leon says and goes to the fridge for a bottle of water.

"I'm not an idiot! I'm the Great Ninja Yuffie!" Yuffie sticks her nose up in the air and grabs a bottle of grape juice and angrily starts chugging it down.

"We have a surprise for ya guys." Cid says with a grin.

"... Pizza for dinner?" Cloud says hopefully.

"Nope! Guess again, Blondie!" Cid says, chuckling.

".... PEPPERONI pizza for dinner?" Yuffie puts in and burps loudly.

"Excuse you." Leon shakes his head and tosses Yuffie a napkin.

"thanks!" She wipes the last traces of juice from her mouth.

"... I give up." Cloud says and leans against the counter.

".... Did Aerith win something?" Leon asks.

"... WHOA! How'd ya figure it out?!" Cid says in astonishment.

"... There's a folder of tickets sticking out of your pocket, Cid." Leon points.

"... YUP! We're gonna go to France!" Cid says proudly. Leon, Yuffie and Cloud are all quiet.

".. What'd I say?"

"HELL NO!!!" All three shout.

"I GOT ARRESTED! THE GREAT NINJA YUFFIE WILL NOT GO!" Yuffie shouts, in the third person.

"No way, Cid! I ain't going! I got arrested! ... FOR _SEPHIROTH_! NO WAY IN HELL !" Cloud shouts.

".... We have bad luck there. I refuse." Leon says, shaking his head.

"But we're already packed." Aerith comes down stairs, lugging some suitcases. Leon and Cloud immediately go to help her.

"You're ALL goin' and that's that!" Cid says angrily.

"Make us." Leon and Cloud challenge. Cid just strokes his chin and whispers something in Leon's ear.

"... Really?"

"Yup."

"Alright, I'm going." Leon says and picks up his suitcase.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID HE TELL YOU LEONHART?!" Cloud shouts. Leon just smirks and walks with his suitcase to the car.

"Cloud, you know everything's paid right?" Aerith asks.

"... It's free?"

"Yes."

"Weeeeell, maybe I should go. To keep an eye on Yuffie here." Cloud says with a sheepish grin.

"TRAITOR!!! TRAITOR!!!!! SEXIST!!!" Yuffie shouts.

"... How am I a sexist?" Cloud asks.

"I'll figure it out! BUT THE GREAT NINJA YUFFIE NEVER GIVES UP WITHOUT A FIGHT!!!" Yuffie yells and Cloud just rolls his eyes and picks her up.

"NOOOO!!! PUT ME DOWN!!!"

"No." Cloud carries her to the car and locks the door. Yuffie glares at him and they finish bringing the suitcases to the car. Cid drives to the airport.

"Cid, next time, I'M driving!" Cloud says.

"I'm gonna be sick..." Yuffie moans, her face green.

"Only way you're drivin' my car Strife, is over mah dead body!" Cid growls.

"That could be arranged." Cloud snaps.

"Leon!" A woman cries out and Leon happily goes to meet his girlfriend.

"So THAT'S how you got him to come. Evil, evil." Yuffie growls. Leon and Cloud starts arguing in the line resulting in a sword fight, security being called, and Cid smacking both of them with a newspaper.

".... I'm sleepy." Yuffie says after they got on the plane.

"Then go to sleep." Leon tells her.

"But I want peanuts!"

"HERE! Take em!" Cid throws her a packet of peanuts.

"Everyone, I hope you enjoy your flight on Flight 65." A cheerful voice on the intercom says.

"NEVER!!!!" Yuffie throws the peanuts at a flight attendant.

"Can I HELP YOU?" He growls at her. Yuffie's eyes widen.

"... No. I'm fine. Though, if I could have my peanuts, that'd be cool." She says in a whisper.

and The flight goes on without conflicts.

"Zzzz....grah oa..... uhgyo..." Cloud snoring loudly.

" SOMEONE SHOOT HIM!!!" Yufffie moans.


	4. Arriving in France: Introducing BBS

**So far so good!**

**Disclaimers: As much as I like to mess with them, Organization XIII and The island trio are not mine. OR the FF guys.**

**OR These guys!**

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Paris France

"It's about time we get time to ourselves!" A blonde kid says proudly.

"Calm down, Ven! It's the first day!" A blue haired girl scolds.

"SO?!"

"... Aqua, Ventus, if you two are going to fight, will you PLEASE do it where I don't have to listen to it?" a brown haired teen sighs.

"Sure thing Terra! Now.... Why don't we take this outside Aqua?" Ventus says with a wink. Terra walks outside for some air.

"Whatever, I wanted to see the shops anyways." Aqua stands up and flips her blue hair at Ventus annoyed and keeps walking out the door. Ventus follows.

"HEY LOOK! IT'S ROXAS!!!" A random yell comes out of nowhere.

"Huh?!" A boy tackles Ventus to the ground.

"GET OFF!!!"

"Yup, that's Roxas alright!" A red haired girl says with a smile.

"Pity. I was hoping not to have to see your ugly face this time." A silver boy groans.

"Me and him have the SAME face!" the brown haired boy who tackled Ventus says.

"So? It looks worse on him." The silver haired boy rolls his eyes.

"Riri, stop being mean! I've always wanted to meet Rox Rox!" A brown haired girl cheers.

"Rox Rox?" Sora asks.

"GET OFF!! NOW!!" Ventus angrily shoves Sora off of him and sighs.

"..... You okay, Ven?" Aqua asks.

"No."

".. You want some sea salt ice cream?"

"... Fuck yeah." Ventus stands up.

"Can we tag along?! I don't know my way around!" Erika says.

"And I'M saying you go back to the hotel!" Riku tells her.

"No way Riri! I'm gonna go play tourist and there's nothing you can do to stop me." She glares at him.

".... I am NOT playing nanny!" Ventus snaps.

"HEY! We're YOUR age!" Sora growls.

"Don't look like it to me! You little shrimp!"

"WE'RE THE SAME HEIGHT!" Sora stands up and glares right in Ventus's face. Exactly the same height.

".... Scary." Kairi and Aqua stare at each other.

"Nice hair!" Kairi says to Aqua.

"Thanks! I like yours too!" Aqua says, instantly becoming Kairi's friend.

"....." Riku and Terra are having a glaring contest.

"sooo.... Roxas, why are you here? And why did Namine cut and dye her hair?" Sora asks.

"... My name's VENTUS!"

"Suuuuure." Sora says with a grin.

"kid, I'm gonna kick your ass. RIGHT NOW." Ventus pulls out his Keyblade only to hear:

"ROXAS SAMA!!!" Cue crowd of fangirls.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" Ventus goes running. The crowd of cheering girls follow him.

".... Oh-kay, I'm guessing that guy wasn't Roxas then!" Sora says cheerfully.

"YOU THINK?!" Everyone yells.


	5. Why You Don't Let ORGXIII Drive

**Lol, I GOT VENTUS!! :3**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy or Birth By Sleep are not mine. OR Erika. She's her own person dammit! XD**

**BTW, I must like torture cause now, I GOT FOUR FICS up in progress!!!**

**This one... DATC, DADI, and now Xion in Wonderland.**

**Lol, it's EXACTLY what you think.**

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Ciel Hotel (lol, we're back here again!)

"Superior?" Roxas asks.

"Yes Thirteen?" Xemnas asks as he's getting the rooms.

"... You know that you just put me and Namine in the SAME room right?" Larxene points out.

"So?"

"um... Superior?" Roxas tries again.

"I want MY own room."

"No. You, Miss Namine and Xion are ALL sharing ONE room." Xemnas says.

"WHY?!"

"Superior? I got a question!" Roxas interrupts.

"Cause. It's cheaper this way." Xemnas says and continues flipping through the keys.

"YOU CHEAP ASS WIPE!" Larxene growls.

"Your mother." Xemnas says in reply and starts giving the keys to each group.

"Superior!!" Roxas says again.

"WHAT?!"

"... Can I take Namine to a museum?" He asks shyly.

".. Yes. Take Xion and Axel with you." Xemnas says and gives him the key to his and Axel's room.

"... Do I have to?"

"YES. NOW GO!" Xemnas hands him an envelope of French currency and throws the group out of the hotel.

"...Oww... Hey, I got an idea." Axel says with a grin.

"What?" Xion asks.

"We take his bike. Last time, he got stuck with a PINK one!" Axel laughs.

"YEAH!" they head to the rental place. They quickly find...

"HOLY SHIT, A MUSTANG!" Xemnas rented a CAR.

"We're TAKING IT!" Axel and Roxas cheer.

"... YAY! Can I roll the window down?" Xion asks.

"Sure, whatever floats your boat!" Axel takes the car and they go for a drive.

".....GET ME OUT!!! AXEL CAN'T DRIVE!!!!" Roxas howls out the window.

"CAN TOO!" Axel snaps.

"CANNOT!" Namine, Xion and Roxas all say in unison.

"Stupid teenage punks.." Axel swerves the car and nearly hits a fire hydrant.

"I WANNA LIVE!!! PLEASE!!!! I BARELY GOT MY HEART!!! I WANNA LIIIIIIIVE!" Xion wails.

"SHUT UP! NOW!" Axel yells at her.

"LEFT! LEFT!!" Roxas yells.

"NO BACK SEAT DRIVING!" Axel shouts and then he hits something.

".... Axel, you just hit someone!" Namine screams in horror.

"...... May-be he's okay." Axel says nervously and then the kid they hit opens the door to the back seat.

"LET ME IN LET ME IN!!!" Ventus screams and locks the door.

"HUH?!" Roxas and Ventus stare at each other.

"TWO BIG BROTHERS!!!" Xion squeals and hugs them both.

"DRIVE MAN, DRIVE!" Roxas and Ventus say in unison. Axel floors it. There's a group of girls behind them.

"GTA THEM! GRAND THEFT AUTO!" Ventus yelps as one manages to catch up to the car.

"I AM NOT RUNNING PEOPLE OVER!" Axel shouts at him.

"You ran HIM over!" Xion points out.

"THAT was an accident." Axel says nervously.

"GIVE ME THE WHEEL!" Roxas shoves Axel and slams on the brake.

"... HEY! You don't have a license!" Axel points out. Roxas flips out his wallet and pulls out a lisence.

"I can drive as long as an adult's in the car. NOW MOVE!" Roxas shoves Axel to the back and starts driving.

"Hey, he's not all that bad." Ventus comments. Roxas's concentrating and then he accidently hits a cart.

"SORRY!" Roxas says out the window.

"MY CABBAGES!!!"

"TRY STRAWBERRIES NEXT TIME!!!" Xion shouts at the guy before they keep going.

"... I take it back." Ventus says, turning pale.

"ROXAS BRAKE! NOW!" Namine commands. He slams on the brakes, and they end up at...

"Holy shit, we made it to the Louve!" Axel says in amazement.

"... Gimme a Gummy Ship ANY day." Roxas pants.


	6. The Louvre and Axel the Art Thief?

.... Axel can't drive.

Got it memorized?

**... I have a feeling those kids are gonna end up traumatized....**

**Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, or Birth By Sleep are not mine.**

**BTW, when IS BBS coming out?! I wanna get a head start on pleading and begging on my kness! XD**

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Louvre

".... THAT'S the Mona Lisa?" Xion says and glares at the picture.

"... Xion, that's a T-Shirt." Roxas points out.

"... Oh. LET'S GO SEE MONA!!!" Xion squeals.

".... How'd I end up here?!" Ventus sighs.

"Shut up, Big Brother Ven!" Xion says, her immediate nickname getting on Roxas's nerves.

"FOR THE LAST TIME! HE'S NOT YOUR BROTHER!!!" Axel and Roxas say in unison.

".... Can I call you Ven Ven?" Xion asks.

"... Whatever, it's not as bad as Chocoass." Ventus nods.

".... Pfft, Chocoass!" Roxas cracks up.

"... Yeah, I never forgave Terra for that..." Ventus grimaces.

"Sssssooooo, can we go?!" Xion asks again.

".... Where's Namine?" Axel asks, noticing for the first time Namine wasn't there.

"... Over there." Roxas points and they all see Namine in ecstasy over the various painting.

".... She likes to draw huh?" Ventus asks.

"No shit Sherlock!" Axel says sarcastically.

"THE NAME IS VENTUS."

"ROXAS!! Look! It's a Van Goh!" Namine says excited and drags Roxas off to see the painting.

"You know... it's all just a picture! I don't really see the big deal." Axel says, staring at a picture.

"Lemme see!" Xion looks.

"Rated R buddy." Axel claps his hand over Xion's eyes and keeps moving.

".... The Mona Lisa!" Namine says proudly as she shows it to them.

"... She's not all that hot." Axel comments.

"AXEL!" Xion steps on his foot.

"OW!!!" Axel swears violently in Spanish.

"She was painted by Leonardo Da Vinci and-" Axel raises his hand.

"Yes?" Namine asks.

".... I read somewhere that he was gay. True or false, teacher?" Axel asks.

".... I don't know... Maybe?" Namine says nervously.

"Kay, that was it. " Axel waits to hear more from Namine.

"it's a very old painting, and Da Vinci took four years to finish it."

"Wow, he musta not been all that good then." Ventus comments. Namine glares at him.

".. I'll be quiet." Ventus laughs nervously.

"It has been suggested that the portrait of the Mona Lisa is in fact Leonardo's female version of himself!" Namine says.

".... WHOA!!" Xion makes a face.

"... And what's wrong with that?!" Roxas snaps.

"... Nothin'." Ventus and Axel start laughing.

"HE MUSTA HAD A WEIRD ASS IMAGE OF HIMSELF!" Axel chokes out while laughing.

"August 22, 1911 - Mona Lisa was stolen but soon recovered." Namine reads out of the guide book.

"....And how much is it worth?" Axel asks seriously.

".....approximately $700 million. U.S." Namine says. Axel raise an eyebrow.

"... I gotta go make a phone call. 'Cuse me." Axel walks away.

"... If he's even thinking of stealing it, I'm gonna kill him!" Namine says angrily.

".. Run Axel, run." Ventus, Xion and Roxas say in unison.

Axel POV

"Yo Xiggy." I say into the phone.

"What's up? Kinda was takin' a nap here?" Xigbar says sleepily.

"... Wanna do a job with me?"

"... I'm interested. What kinda job?" Xigbar asks, with a tone of interest in his voice.

"... Two words. Mona. Lisa."

"... That's a toughy. How much?"

".... $700 million." Xigbar whistles in surprise.

"I'm in."

"Meet me in the Louvre today at noon. ... And be... discreet." I say with a sly grin.

"... Discreet. I can do that." Xigbar grins.

"... See ya then."

"Until then, partner." We both hang up.

"Well, at least Roxas can't say I don't have goals." I chuckle to myself.

**X xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx X**

**OH MY GOD!!!**

**ART THIEF!!! XD**

**If you want Axel and Xigbar to take the Mona Lisa, review!**

**If not... Hehehehe, France will soon be missing a national treasure.**


	7. Reunion and Sora arrested? Again?

**Lol, XIGGY AND AXEL ARE ART THEIVES!!!**

**hehehe, Xigbar could do it, the whole Space thing...**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy to my knowledge are not mine. Unless Square Enix gave me a late X Mas present!!!**

**Lol, as if to take a line from Xigbar.**

**X xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx X**

Hotel Ciel

"... Sora? Who are these two?" Mrs. Minami asks.

"... Terra and Aqua! We're friends now." Sora says proudly.

"Pleasure to meet you ma'am." Terra says politely.

"Sora! I TOLD YOU NOT TO LET THEM COME TO LUNCH!" Riku whispers angrily in Sora's ear.

"... But... They're in this hotel too!" Sora says.

"... Hey.... YUFFIE!!" Kairi runs up to the little Ninja and they hug.

"KAIRI!!! TAKE ME HOME!!!" Yuffie wails.

"... Kairi?" Cloud asks. Leon looks up.

"..Oh shit."

"HIYA LEON!!!" Sora tackle hugs him.

"... So THAT'S Sora!" A woman laughs.

"huh? Who're you?" Sora asks.

"I'm Rinoa. Nice to finally meet the infamous Sora!" Rinoa laughs.

"I deny everything!" Sora says seriously.

"Hahahaha! I'm sure we'll be good friends." she smiles at Sora. Sora glances at Leon and bluntly asks:

"When are you gonna marry her Leon?"

"HUH?!" Leon chokes on his soda and glares at Sora.

"Just a question...." Sora says innocently and goes back to his family.

"Can I hang out with you guys?" Yuffie whimpers. Kairi nods.

"Sure!"

"... So what's our stragety for getting Ven back?" Terra asks.

"... We scout, then if we can find-"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" they see two figures running.

"ROXAS!" Sora calls out.

"Ventus!" Terra and Aqua shout in unison.

"HELP!!!!" Ventus and Roxas skid into the hotel and both rapidly hide under the table where the Minamis and Takamuras were eating.

"ROXAS! ROXAS!" A group of girls chant and run right past the hotel.

"....." The whole table's shaking as the two tremble.

"..... HAHAHAHAHAAHA!" Riku bursts out into laughter and Terra's chuckling as he helps the duo from under the table.

"A-Are they gone?" Roxas whispers.

"... " Ventus peeks out the window and nods.

"Phew! We got chased from the Louvre!" Roxas sighs.

"Yeah... This happen to you a lot?" Ventus asks.

"... Yup." They both sigh and order soda.

"... Am I goin' crazy or are there two Roxases?" Dante whispers to Yuki.

" I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO HUGZ THEM BOTH!" Yuki squeals and glomps both of them.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Ventus blushes, but Roxas was already used to it, so he just hugged her back.

"sooo... Where to?" Aqua asks.

"... Let's go shopping!" kairi says immediately.

"ummm... We nearly got killed by rabid fangirls and no one cares?" Roxas says angrily.

"No." Everyone immediately retorts.

"Aw, that's just cold!" Ventus says.

"TO THE SHOPS!!!" The girls cheer and the guys get dragged out with them.

"hmmm... Where would we find some chocolate?" Kairi asks.

"Sora, go ask that cop." Riku nudges him.

"Sure! Pardon moi, but-" Sora freezes.

"YOU!" the cop says immediately.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" Sora screams and tries to run for it.

"You are under arrest!" The cop immediately says.

"NOOO!!! I DON'T WANNA GET GANG RAPED!!! RIKU HELP!!! KAIRI!!!" Sora yells but he gets dragged out to the cop car.

"... What the fuck just happened?!" Everyone says in unison.

**X xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx X**

**What just happened, was Sora got his ass thrown in jail!**

**AGAIN!!!!**

**MUH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!**

**lol, will Sora be able to escape and will the Jail House Gang get back together?**

**Stay tuned for the next chapter of Return To France!**

**... and maybe Pokemon.**


	8. Reunion in Jail: Frank's Return

**Lol, this might make some people PREEEETYhappy! :D**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts, Birth by Sleep, Final Fantasy and anything else I can think of... is not mine. Only the Original Characters, except for Erika.**

**Welcome back my old friend!!! **

**and nobody's being fair about my new fics!!!!**

**It's not like I'm choosing to do them!! IT'S FRANK!!! HE'S MAKING ME!!!**

**Frank: AM NOT!!!!**

**.... Kay, then Feralis.**

**Feralis: JUST START THE CHAPTER!!!!**

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Jail

"NOOO!" Sora gets thrown into a cell.

"Stay." The officer commands and he goes into an office.

"I'M INNOCENT!!!! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!! HEY! PARLE VOUS ENGLISH?!" Sora screams.

"Save it, they're not gonna listen." A familiar voice says.

"... Who're you?" Sora asks.

"... Frank Smith."

"FRANK?! FRANK!!!" Sora hugs him.

"SORA?! HOLY SHIT! You got arrested again!" Frank laughs.

"YUP! I still have your Email and I emailed you a couple times, but it's good to see you!" Sora laughs.

"What was it this time? Prostitution again?" Frank teases.

"No way! I saw the guy who arrested me the first time so I ran! He caught me, and here I am!"Sora explains.

"... Evading arrest. That's why." Frank sighs but he grins.

"Why are you here?" Sora asks.

"Well... It's a long story."

"I like long stories remember?" Sora gets comfortable on the one chair in the cell.

Start Flash back

_A few hours before_

"Remember Frank, you have to come back at noon. Okay? Meet me at-?" Frank's mom pauses, testing her son to see if he had been listening.

"The Louvre. I remember." Frank sighs and remembers the LAST time he had been in France. He laughs, remembering his jail break.

"Now, no trouble this time okay?" Frank's mom sighs.

"Alright, I'll try not to get arrested this time. Though, if Sora's here, I just might end up seeing him again that way!" Frank jokes.

"Noon, by the Mona Lisa." His mom gives him a kiss on the cheek and walks out the door.

"Hmm... Might as well go walk around." Spending several hours looking through shops and checking to see if he recognized any one, Frank finally hears the hour chime 12.

"OH CRAP!" Frank rushes to the Louvre, and finally reaches the Mona Lisa. He looks around and takes a seat on a bench.

"Hm... What do you think, Xig? Can you get it?" A man's voice asks.

".. huh?" Frank looks and two men in long black cloaks are talking in front of the Mona Lisa.

"Sure, no problem." One with an eye patch concentrates and the famous picture vanishes from the glass case.

"WHOA!" Frank says, his eyes wide.

"...Hehehe, watch this." The first man, the one with his hood up, calls out to a girl.

"Yes?" She asks, and she looks suspicious.

"Hey, what's your name?" The man asks.

"... Erika."

"Well, Erika, I need your help." He says.

"........ I shouldn't talk to strange-"

"But my friend, he hurt himself and we were sketching a picture of the Mona Lisa for an art class we have together. Could you help us carry out the canvas?" He smiles and motions to an easel.

"Well......" The girl nods and picks up a few art supplies.

"thanks, we really appreciate it." The one with the eye patch says. He had covered up his face with the hood.

"THEY'RE STEALING THE MONA LISA!!" Frank whispers in astonishment. He decides to follow. The first man is carrying the Mona Lisa, now on the canvas.

"HEY!" A guard yells at them and Frank runs up to snatch the Mona Lisa from the man's grasp.

"Take it kid!" The man laughs and they both vanish.

"... Uh... UH OH!!! Riri'll get mad if I'm arrested!!" Erika flees.

"HUH?!" The guard slams Frank to the ground and the police take him to jail.

End Flash back

".... YOU WERE FRAMED?!" Sora yells.

"Yup." Frank says nonchalantly.

"That's so not fair...." Sora sniffles, in tears about his friend.

"Awww... It's okay, Sor-"

"LEMME GOOO!!!! I DIDN'T HARM A SOUL!!!!" A man screams as he's thrown into the cell across from Sora and Frank's.

"HI MARLUXIA!" they both say in unison.

".... Well, seems like we'll be having a reunion after all." Marluxia chuckles.

"... Poker anyone?" Sora pulls out a deck of cards.

"DEAL!"

**x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x**

**HA! SEE?!**

**I CAN UPDATE A BUNCH OF FICS AT THE SAME TIME!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!**

**Feralis:... you landed Frank in jail.**

**....Soooo? Review folks!!**

**While I try, i mean SUCCEED in updating DATC!**


	9. Larxene's Arrest and the Boys Run

**Muh hahahaah, I GOT MARLUXIA!!!!!!**

**..... Does ANYONE care about Marly?**

**No?**

**Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy are not mine, and neither is France.**

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x X**

Ciel Hotel

"...... So what happened to Sora?" Axel asks.

"... he got arrested!" Ventus says.

"Hmm...... Again!" Everyone starts laughing.

"Hey, I have an idea! If one of US got arrested, we'd find him faster!" Riku jokes.

"Great idea Riri! Roxas can get-" Erika starts.

"...It was a joke, 'Rika." Riku ruffles his sister's hair and laughs. Outside they hear a commotion.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! YOU GOT ME ARRESTED LAST TIME!!!" Larxene screams. A man in a waiter outfit tries to run, but she catches up and slams him to the ground.

"...In 3....2....1." Axel counts.

"HEY! LEMME GO!!!" Larxene struggles against the 30 or so officers trying to get her off the waiter.

"...She really holds grudges doesn't she?" Sora asks Xigbar.

"You don't know the half of it, we're lucky she didn't kill him." Xigbar chuckles. They go outside to watch the show.

"GAAAH!!" One of the officers is thrown ten feet in the air.

"HA! That's what you get for messing with the Savage Nymph!" Larxene cheers.

"SAVAGE NYMPHO!!!!" Axel calls out with a grin.

"GGRRRRR!!!!" Larxene tries to tackle him, but an officer sees the distraction and manages to shove her into the back of the squad car.

"Buh bye Larxy!" Axel winks at her and waves.

"YOU FLAME HEADED BASTARD!!!! I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS!!!" Larxene screams out the window.

"Bye Larxy!!!" Everyone, but Roxas,Erika, Riku and Kairi say.

"LARXENE! LOOK FOR SORA!" Riku and Kairi say in unison.

"Riku, you're the pimp! All I'm saying!" Larxene cracks up. And the squad car drives off.

"... The pimp?" Riku asks questioningly but everyone shrugs.

"KYAAAAAA!!! ROXAS SAMA!!" A cheer from about 20 different girls.

"OH HELL NO! RUN!!!" Ventus and Roxas take off.

"YAY!!! ROXAS SAMA!!" The girls cheerfully follow.

"..You know? I bet those girls only want exercise!" Xigbar laughs.

"OH MY GOD NOOOO!!!" Vexen gets trampled by the fangirls.

"... Or maybe they're not." Xigbar says, his eye widening.

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x X**

**uh... this was kinda short, but at least I managed to PWN Vexen in it!!!**

**hehe, I'll go work on DATC and DADI now. *goes off***

**BTW, I've got a schedule of what fics I'm working on.**

**Monday: Xion in Wonderland, Return of Organization**

**Tuesday: Return to France, DATC, DADI**

**Wednesday: Return of The Organization, Baby Organization**

**Thursday:Baby Organization, Datc, Dadi**

**Friday: Datc, anyother fic I might want to work on.**

**Saturday: I'll try to update ALL of them**

**Sunday: Ditto.**

**the first fic on each day is the one GUARANTEED to be updated!**

**and as always, I begz for reviews. Pwease? Pwetty pwease with a Heartless on top? *pleading face***


	10. Jail House Gang Reunion: Part One

**Weeell, I got Larxene!**

**hehehe, this should be fun......**

**Disclaimers: Kh, FF, and BBS are NOT mine. YET. *insert evil laughter***

**X x x x x x x x xx x x x**

Jail

"HEEEEEEY!!! LEMME GO!!!" Larxene snarls as Luxord and the others look up.

"Well, well! How the mighty have fallen, 12." Marluxia chuckles.

"SHUT UP!" Larxene sends a lightning bolt at him.

"YIKES! You'll kill someone!" Frank snaps, it hit him too.

"...Let's play poker!" Sora cheers. Then they hear someone else being brought in.

"OOOH COME ON!! IT WAS A STATUE!!! WHO THE FREAK CARES ABOUT A STATUE?!" Yuffie complains and she gets thrown in with Larxene.

"Hiya! Welcome to the first reunion of the Jail House Gang!" Frank laughs.

"Sooo, whatcha in here for?" Larxene asks.

"...I graffittied!" Yuffie says proudly.

"...I got mistaken for a convict!" Sora says.

"A step up from being a prostitute! Congrats!" Larxene and Marluxia cheer.

"WHY THANK YOU!" Sora bows.

"WHOOO! I got framed!" Frank says.

"YEAH! I beat up the same waiter!" Larxene laughs.

"......" Marluxia looks embarrassed.

"What? what was it??" Everyone asks.

".... I stole a rose bush again." He said.

"DAMMIT MARLY!!!" Everyone cracks up laughing.

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x xx x X**

**Yup, short one again.**

**Review folks!**


	11. Luxord's Story

**Lol, I'm not paying attention in this!!!**

**So... To clarifiy and since you folks like this...**

**Disclaimers: KH FF BBS AIN'T MINE. OR THE SICK PUPPIES!!!**

***song is Nothing Really Matters***

**OH YEAH! I want y'all to go check out my friend Crimson Darkness 0013's new KH story!**

**For someone who likes comedy and junk, this serious fic is pretty good!**

**Also, I'm now a BETA reader, whatever that means, and I'll be glad to check over stories with anyone!**

**Please note that I am a spelling nut, and I'll point out just about anything! :D**

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Jail

"..Luxord?! WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET HERE?!" Sora flinches and everyone just stares at Luxord.

"...When indeed? However... This is not exactly the best circumstances to reunite with each other my friends." He says with a laugh.

"True. But what's your story?" Larxene asks.

"YEAH! Tell us!" Frank and Sora say in unison.

"...This should be simply delightful." Marluxia laughs.

"Well..... It starts at the Louvre." Luxord starts.

"OH MY GOD, NOT YOU TOO." Frank says.

"SHH! Flashback is starting!" Sora hushes him.

Flashback (YAY! :D)

"..... Am I supposed to babysit Demyx?" Luxord asks. Demyx looks embarrassed and keeps playing his sitar.

"Yes. We don't want him kidnapped again." Xemnas tells him. Luxord glares at Demyx and then sighs.

"Very well then. Let's go test our luck, ." Luxord makes him get up and they go wander the streets of Paris for a while.

".... So what are we doing???" Demyx asks.

"..Simple. We're simply finding a few suck- I mean willing particepants in my new card game!" Luxord says.

"...Xemnas said not to con people!! HE SAID!" Demyx protests.

"I don't care! THERE! GO play sitar or something." Luxord walks over to a nice looking couple and starts talking to them. The man nods and Luxord smiles broadly and pulls out a deck of cards.

".....Luxord!!" Demyx complains quietly. He starts strumming his sitar and singing softly.

_Does it matter in the scheme of things  
While there are killers on the street and people going through bins  
We got lawyers and pimps all with five faces  
Setting up shop in all the same places  
I say hello and you say goodbye  
I put out my hand and your spit in my eye_

_The trap is set for anyone whose ever thought  
But deep down below everybody knows theres a price and everything can be bought  
Not much left to live for theres not much left to be  
Nothing really matters  
Really matters to me_

_This is how they think this is how they feel  
This is their idea of people keeping it real  
They're supposed to be working but there so fucking slack  
Taking one step forward and two steps back  
Now with a slap on the back in the sack for a shack and then everybodys happy today  
I dont know what ive been told what do you say_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_I wanna go home!_

_The trap is set for anyone whose ever thought but deep down below everybody knows theres a price and everything can be bought  
Not much left to live for theres not much left to be  
Nothing really matters  
Really matters to me  
The trap is set for anyone whose ever thought but deep down below everybody knows theres a price and everything can be bought  
Not much left to live for theres not much left to be  
Nothing really matters  
Really matters to me!_

"Wow he's great! Let's go listen!" The woman says to her husband and he laugsh and nods

"....DEEEMYX!!!" Luxord grabs him by the throat and decides to ditch him.

"I'M SORRY LUXY! I just did what you told me!" Demyx wails. Luxord glares at him.

"Find your own way around Paris. I'm going back to the hotel." Luxord says coldly. Demyx gasps.

"You're... You're leaving me here?! NOOO! I'LL BE A GOOD BOY! I PROMISE! LUXORD!!!" Demyx wails as Luxord leaves him behind.

End Flashback

"And then I got arrested because some man took a lady's purse and I was framed." Luxord finishes.

"...... YOU'RE AN ASS!!!" Everyone screams.


	12. ShopKeeper And Sephiroth?

**More KH! MORE FRANCE!!!!**

**....... MORE RESEARCH DAMMIT! *slams head against desk***

**Neither is mine, just so you know.**

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x x X**

France

"GAAAAAH!!" Ventus and Roxas run inside a shop.

"Hmm? Customers?" the man asks. He chuckles when he recognizes them.

"hiya trhere! The usual?" Roxas asks, his face red from running.

"naturallmente, my friend." The Shop keeper says and pets his pet rat on his shoulder. He reaches behind the counter and hands Roxas two bundles.

"Thanks!" Roxas goes into the changing room and comes out, completely changed and not looking a THING like how he did before.

"....Damn." Ventus say and he changes into his own clothes. Both dressed in darker shades of clothing, dark shades, combat boots, and armor like shirts, they looked like male models.

"THANKS!" Roxas runs out the store. Ventus tags along as Roxas slips through a Corridor Of Darkness.

"....The boy is gonna get himself killed. Nice way to die though."The man comments in French.

"..............SHH!" Roxas shushes Ventus as they run along the roof tops of the city.

"....DIE PIGEON!" Ven hisses under his breath and kicks at an innocent pidgeon.

"WILL YOU BE QUIET?! They've got bionic hearing!" Roxas whispers.

"Oh come on! Stop that! That's a big load of bull-"

"OH MY GOD TWO ROXAS!!!"

"..........I BELIEVE! I BELIEVE!!!" Ventus yells and they both leap off the roof, into an awaiting Corridor.

BAM!

"......That was my toast, jackass." Axel says as Ventus and Roxas groan on top of the breakfast table.

"Roxas, are you okay?" Namine says and helps them get off the table.

"....... She's cute." Ven comments.

"And mine." Roxas says and shoves him off the table.

"......I think I have a fork stuck up my a-" Ventus starts to say.

"OH MY GOD! Look! It's SEPHIROTH!!" Xion stage whispers and points. Sure, enough, it WAS Sephiroth!

"Coffee." Sephiroth orders.

"H-H-How would you like it?" The waiter stammers nervously.

"Black. And bring me the special." Sephiroth says, in perfect French.

"............................Something's gonna happen, I KNOW IT!" Axel says and takes a bite out of his pancakes.

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x X**

**Bout time a FF character came out....**

**It's all been about chasing Ven And Roxy around France!! DX**

**Dammit, ideas..... leaving.... head........**

**You guys, how should a CERTAIN chocobo head be.... 'detained'? **

***smiles evilly***

**AND YUFFIE! WE MUST NEVER FORGET THE GREAT NINJA YUFFIE!!!**


	13. Cloud Gets Arrested

**this is soo weird....**

**this should end soon.... since this is the one fici have no idea on what to do next!**

**Diclaimers: KHis not mine, BBS is not mine, FF is not mine.**

**X x x x xx x xx x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xxx X**

Paris Ariport

"OH MY FUCKIN' GAWD! THAT TOOK FOREVER!" Cloud Strife complains.

"Shut up, Strife." Leon Leonhartretorts.

"You want something, Leonhart?" Cloud snarls.

"Nope. Just keep your face away. Your breath reeks." Leon laughs.

"WHY YOU!!!" Cloud pulls out his Buster Sword.

"Excuze moi! Monsieur!" a man calls out.

"WHAT?!" Cloud snaps.

"You cannot 'ave zat in ze airport!" He scolds. (really bad accent guys, sorry)

"And you're gonna do what?" Cloud grins.

"...." the man turns pale.

"Dude. I suggest you freakin' R-U-N." Cloud laughs.

"Sécurité!!!" The man screams.

"Huh?" Cloud gets tackled by a bunch of guys in uniforms.

"Good luck in jail, STRIFE." Leon laughs as they drag the screaming and swearing Cloud away to an awaiting police car.

"YOU MOTHERFUCKER LEONHART! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS! YOU'RE DEAD! DEAD YOU HEAR ME?! DEEEEEEAD!!!" Cloud screams as they shove him in the car.

"Farewell, my friend! Bon au revoir!!" Leon says in French and waves. The car drives away with Cloud in the backseat.

"Where's Cloud?" Yuffie asks when she comes back with her luggage.

"Hmm? He went somewhere. I don't know where...." Leon says innocently.

"Then why'd I see him being carried off by the Fuzz?!" Yuffie yells.

".... Cause he got arrested?" Leon says with a hidden smile.

**X x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x X**

**I learned something today:**

**LEON DOES NOT HAVE YOUR BACK.**

**IF YOU GET ARRESTED, HE WILL NOT HELP YOU.**

**or maybe it was because it was Cloud?**


	14. Yuffie's Story

**KH, FF, and BBS is not mine okay!**

**France is not doing well...**

**I think I'll start the chapter now.**

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x xx x X**

Jail

"Frank!" A voice calls out.

"Huh?" Frank peeks out from the bars.

"Steve! Phil!" He says in surprise.

"We'll bust you out!" The one with shortly cropped blonde hair says, his blue eyes glittering.

"... Phil, for the last time! Just because you're in France, doesn't mean you're James Bond!" The shorter one with black hair says.

"You're just jealous of my skill, Steve." Phil retorts.

"Man, am I glad to see you two!" Frank says.

"Who're these guys?" Larxene asks.

"Why hello Mademoiselle! I am Phillip Pervola the Third. You can call me Phil." Phil says, starting to flirt with Larxene.

"... Oh yeah?" Larxene says, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh huh. You know something? You must be tired." Phil says.

"Great... The pick up line du jour." Steve says, rolling his eyes.

"Tired? Why?" Larxene says suspciously.

"Cause you've been running through my mind ALL day!" Phil says. All the guys groan.

"That was lame!" Marluxia snaps.

"Terrible!" Luxord says.

"Hahahahaha! That was funny!!" Sora cracks up.

"Hey.. .Are these the dudes?" Steve asks.

"Yup. These guys are the ones I got arrested with last time." Frank confirms.

"COOL! Which one of ya'll is Roxas?" Steve asks. Phil was busy flirting with Larxene to notice him.

"... Roxas isn'-" Sora starts to say.

"LEMME GO! LEMME GO! I'M INNOCENT!!" A voice screams as they start being dragged down the stairs.

"Dude, Operation: Hidey Hole!" Phil says, snapping back into Secret Agent Mode.

"..... What?" Steve says.

"... HIDE UNDER THE FUCKING COT!" Phil slips into an empty cell and hides. Steve does the same.

".... You know..." Roxas gets thrown into Steve's cell and the door locks.

"Shit!" Steve realizes the flaw in Phil's plan.

"... Who the hell are you?!" Roxas demands.

".. Steve Browning..... Don't hurt me." Steve says.

".... I SHALL RETURN!!!! WITH AN ARMY!!!" Phil yells, leaping out of the cell and rushing out the door.

"PHIL YOU JACKASS!!! GET ME OUTTA HERE!!" Steve screams.

"....... Hahahahahaha!" Larxene howls in laughter and tumbles off her bed.

".... So, Yuffie, how'd you get in this joint?" Frank asks, completely ignoring Steve. He knew what went on in his friend's head.

"Well... It started like this:"

"Whoo! Flashback!!"

"Sora, shut the hell up!"

Flashback

"Then why'd I see him being carried off by the Fuzz?!" Yuffie yells.

".... Cause he got arrested?" Leon says with a hidden smile.

"..." they both listen as Cloud screams threats to Leon, and vows to kick his ass.

"Ha." Leon chuckle, and then goes to hang out with the chatting Rinoa and Aerith.

"...What am I supposed to do?" Yuffie asks. Leon hands her a key to her room.

"Go play tourist or something. You're old enough to handle it." Leon tells her.

".... Thanks Squall!" Yuffie says, hyper.

"LEON!"

"WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS!" Yuffie runs off.

An hour later

"............................... I'm lost."Yuffie realizes. She had been running around for an hour, randomly buying sovueniors for her room back home.

".......... WAAAAAH!! I'M LOST!!! SQUALL!!!" Yuffie cries out.

"CLOOOUDD!!!! ... Oh right. He got arrested." Yuffie laughs, immediately cheered up. She starts humming to herself, confident in her abilities to get back to the hotel.

"Momma! Momma! It's Santa!" A little girl says.

"Huh?" Yuffie gets hugged by the same little girl who's house Yuffie had burgled in order to try to rescue Cloud from Jail. ... It did not end well.

"Hiya! Remember me?" She says.

"Sure I do! Annalise!" Yuffie says.

"You know my name!" The girl squeals.

"Yup! And I gotta go, Annalise! ... Cause, I have a meeting with the Easter Bunny and Godzilla!" Yuffie says, thinking on her feet.

".... Godzilla too?" Annalise says, wide eyed.

"Yup! He's the Representative for.... Destroy Tokyo day! Where everyone gather hands, sing songs, and then mess up Tokyo Tower!" Yuffie say, looking around for the kid's mom.

"Wow! When IS Destroy Tokyo day?" Annalise asks.

"... Why, it's tomorrow, little Annalise! Ho ho ho!" Yuffie says, imitating a deep laugh.

"Tomorrow?!"

"Yes, bring out your Godzilla action figures, build a Tokyo Tower from blocks and sing the song:

Today is Destroy Tokyo day!

Hip hip hooray!

We'll sing songs, and hold hands.

And blow up Tokyo Tower with a bang!" Yuffie spots the kid's mom.

"Annalise!!!!" The mom cries.

"...And that's it! Bye bye Annalise!!!" yuffie says, running.

"Bye Santa!!!" Annalise waves.

"... Phew....." Yuffie says, and then notices the small statue besides her.

"... Whoa, this guy's short." Yuffie comments.

"... Napoleon. ... Like the ice cream?!" Yuffie says. she pulls out a marker.

"I HATE NAPOLEON ICE CREAM! IT NEVER HAS ENOUGH CHOCOLATE!" Yuffie yells, and scribbles on the tiny man's boots and horse.

"Excusez moi!" A man says.

"Huh? IT'S THE FUZZ!!!" Yuffie screams.

".... You 'ave to come with us, Mademoiselle." the police officer says.

"Look dude! DO NOT CALL ME NAMES!" Yuffie snarls.

"..... Come with me!" The man grabs her arm.

"HEEEEELPP!!! KIDNAPPING!!!" Yuffie screams, struggling.

"...Wait a second!" Yuffie pulls out a shrukin.

"Back off Jack!" she says, waving it. The man takes it.

"Shit."

End Flashback

"That was totally random." Frank comments.

".... AWESOME! Another story Yuffie!" Sora says, entertained.

".... You are a horrible person, Yuffie. Lying to an innocent little girl." Marluxia says.

"SO?!"


	15. Axel Lends A Hand

**All randomness is not mine, yadda yadda yadda!**

**Whooooa, it's been a real long time since I've updated this, huh?**

**Hehehe, my bad.**

**Uh, on the other fic I've neglected for a good time (Kairi in Wonderland), I AM NEVER GOING TO, I OFFICIALLY HATE IT.**

**So, please enjoy this!**

**X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x X**

Jail

"This sucks." Sora sighs as he tries banging on the bars again in his cell.

"I'VE NEVER BEEN TO JAIL BEFORE! OH MY GOD, IF MY FATHER FINDS OUT, HE'S GOING TO FUCKIN' KILL ME!" Steve screams in a state of panic. He starts banging on the bars, shrieking for the guards to let him out.

"DUDE! SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I MAIM YOU!" Larxene yells, whipping out a few Foudres.

"PLEEEEEASE! GET ME OUUUUT!" Steve screams one final time as Frank nonchalantly squeezes his shoulder, making Steve fall over in a dead faint.

"What? Phil taught me that." Frank says as the rest of the group stares.

**The Hotel (which the authoress has forgotten the name of)**

"Look, if Larxene's in jail, then so is Sora." Xemnas says, as Axel finishes his report.

"So? I thought we were cool with the little guy. After all, he did say sorry. And that's all we need, right?" Axel asks. Xemnas shakes his head in dismay.

"Axel, Axel, oh poor naive, little Axel." Xemnas says, putting his hand on Axel's shoulder.

"Getting creeped out here, Superior." Axel mutters to himself.

"Sora was the one who absolutely DESTROYED the Organization! He made me a laughing stock! Have you even SEEN the things on Fanfiction dot net?" Xemnas says.

"Uh... Yeah, I've seen them. Apparently me and Roxas is a very popular couple. Don't know why though." Axel says. Xemnas ignores him.

"THEY CALL ME MANSEX! ME! The leader of Organization XIII! I, who with the goodness of my heart, tried to help us Nobodies to retrieve hearts of our own!" Xemnas exclaims angrily.

".. They call you Mansex because it's an anagram of your name!" Axel tries to explain but Xemnas was on a roll.

"And those ... those... FANGIRLS, for lack of a better word, believe that Saix and I are... are..." Xemnas turns a pale purple color and is unable to speak.

"Are ... buddies?" Axel snickers, knowing full well what was going to happen next. He clicks on the tape recorder he had on his pocket.

"THAT SAIX AND I ARE LOVERS!" Xemnas snarls. Axel grins.

"Jaaackpot." He sings to himself as he switches it off.

"What?" Xemnas asks. He stares at Axel with concern. Axel shrugs.

"Anyway... Knowing full well that ... the fangirls believe this, you must go break our missing members-dammit, Axel, not those ones!- out of jail. Do you understand?" Xemnas questions. Axel was still trying to keep a straight face as he nods.

"IF not... I'll have Vexen torture you with Akuroku." Xemnas says with emphasis on the word. Axel shudders and nods.

"On my way, sup!" Axel runs.

"DON'T CALL ME SUP!" Xemnas yells at his back.

**Jail**

".. Wait a sec." Frank says suddenly as Sora starts dragging his winnings into the cell.

"What?" Larxene asks.

"EVERY SINGLE BLOODY GAME! WHY? HOW DOES HE DO THIS?" Luxord mutters darkly to himself as he checks the cards for the umpteenth time to see if Sora was cheating.

"Do you still have that giant key thing, Sora?" Frank asks.

"The Keyblade? No, I don't have it." Sora says sadly.

"WHAT?" Everyone yells.

"... I locked it in my suitcase! It's in my hotel room." Sora explains. Larxene just groans.

"YOU MORON, YOU CAN SUMMON IT WHENEVER YOU WANT." Marluxia explains very quietly and calmly, though from the twitching he was doing, it was obvious that he really only wanted nothing more than to strangle Sora.

"... But-"

"NO BUTS!" Everyone yells. Sora thinks for a moment and sighs.

"My mom said that I couldn't use it except for emergencies." Sora says.

"This IS an emergency!" Cloud snarls.

"Yeah, it is! Mind a hand?" A familiar voice asks with a chuckle.

"AXEL!"

"Got it memorized?" Axel says with a mischievous grin as he throws down a rope to Roxas' and Steve's cell.

"Tie round the bars!" He instructs.

"Like this?" Steve does so and then they both head as far away as possible from the window.

"XIG! LET 'ER RIP!" Axel calls out in the street. They hear an engine revving as ... Xigbar floors the van and rips the bars right out of the window.

"SWEET! Thanks, Axel!" Roxas says happily as he crawls through the window.

"... So that's why." Axel muses as he throws a second rope to Sora's window.


	16. REALLY SUCKY ENDING! HOORAY!

…**.. This will end soon.**

**All I'm saying.**

**Disclaimers: KH, FF and the lovely city of Paris, France is not mine.**

**Kay, read the random thing. **

* * *

**Random Café**

"Shh… We're incognito." Axel says as he puts on some glasses and takes a seat at one of the tables.

"… Axel?" Roxas asks as he stares at his friend in his random glasses.

"Yeees?" Axel questions, pushing his new eye apparel up on his nose.

"DO YOU THINK YOU'RE SUPERMAN OR SOMETHING? CAUSE YOU LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME! BUT WITH GLASSES!" Roxas tells him.

"Bitch, don't mess with Superman! He's the bomb!" Axel says in defense of his favorite comic book character.

"I always liked Batman better." Sora pipes in, looking at the menu. The two glare at him.

"You're an idiot! The best superhero is-" The two start to say in unison.

"Spiderman!"

"Superman!"

Then they give each other glares.

"Who the fuck cares? Hey! You! Come here!" Larxene shouts to the waiter. He comes over and they both stare at each other.

"…Mademoiselle!" He says with a worried smile. It was the EXACT same waiter she'd been attacking for the last couple France fics.

"…If you bring me a croissant, a black coffee, and some pastries, I will decide whether or not to let you live. Got that?" She warns. He nods and scurries into the café. Within a minute, he runs back out with Larxene's order.

"Now that's what I call service!" Larxene says, looking very pleased as she takes a sip of her coffee. The waiter sighs in relief and goes over to Axel to take his order.

"Oh, wait. This needs a special order. " Axel says. The waiter waits to write it down.

"…. Give me one of everything." Axel says after a very long pause.

"You idiot. Give me… a, um, what's a escargot?" Roxas says. Sora stares at him.

"NO! DON'T GET IT!" Sora shrieks, tackling him.

"CALM DOWN! What is it?" Roxas asks again, shoving the panicking Sora off of him.

"Ze escargot ez a snail cooked in et's shell in garlic butter." The waiter informs him. Roxas thinks it over.

"I'll take one order please. It sounds good!" Roxas says with a grin.

"Then the story got cancelled by the authoress who became too lazy to keep writing it. So, good bye, it's been fun!" Frank says happily.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. That's not how it ends!" Axel says.

"… But…. I seriously don't want to do this anymore… and you guys killed Steve!" Frank says angrily. Steve looks down at himself.

"If I'm dead, then I'm finishing my fries before I leave." Steve says haughtily as he dips his fry into a small pool of ketchup and chomps on it.

"This is what happened! A space ship came out of nowhere and beamed us all up and dropped us off at home!" Sora says as he steals one of the fries.

"That is not going to… holy shit, is that a space ship?" Marluxia says in shock.

_**THE END!**_

**I know that sucked.**


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